２０２５年６月１日～約１年間かけ、キリスト教入門・神学コースで学んでいきたいと思います。只毎回集いたいのに集えない学びたいけど１年間を通すとなれば～？？？と思う方朗報です！この度HPから見る・学ぶことが可能になりました。数年後あ！こんな話してたよねって振り返えり誰かの力になることもあると思います。

29. ３０ The Christian Home　

29. ３０ The Christian Home

1. God designed the family

In the beginning, God created Adam from the dust of the earth but Adam looked around and saw no other creature like himself. He realized that he needed a companion. So God made Eve.

     A. Husband and wife       

Genesis 2:18-24 God saw that it was not good for Adam to be alone so He made Eve out of Adam's rib. God gave Adam his wife and they became one flesh.

    B. Children

Gen 1:28  And God blessed them (Adam and Eve), and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth...

Psa 127:3  Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward. 

Some things to consider when choosing a husband/wife

•   Are they a solid Christian?     2Co 6:14  Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers:           for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness?                  and what communion hath light with darkness? 

•   Is he/she a person of deep character and integrity?   Pro 31:30  Favour is deceitful, and

                                     beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth

                                     the LORD, she shall be praised. 

•   Are you compatible?      The culture, family, customs, and lifestyle you were raised in           have an effect on your values and worldview.

•   Have you prayed about dating this person? Have you asked godly counsel? Is it God's will?

•   How well do you really know this person?  How do they react to problems? Are they careless with money or stingy? Do they have a good work ethic? Are they kind?

•   Are you willing to love and care for this person in sickness or health, rich or poor, for the rest of your life?  Is this who you want to spend the rest of your life with?

The marriage relationship – the most important relationship in the home

Mat 19:6  Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. 

•   Marriage is a holy covenant between a man and a woman before God.

•   A Christian marriage is a picture of the Trinity. Just as the Father, Son and Holy Spirit have communion, the Christian couple realize that the closer they draw to God, the closer they will be to each other. Having prayer together as a couple is a wonderful way to sense this 3-way connection.

•   Marriage is about unselfish giving, not how much I can receive or be fulfilled. If each spouse will give of themselves 110% to each other, they will be wonderfully blessed. But if one spouse through sickness or work or any other reason fails to do their part....the other spouse will do good not to allow themselves to become bitter but ask God for help in loving and caring for the other as before.

•   Marriage is oneness. One in body, one in purpose, one in love, one in direction. When the other is sick, it's as if you are sick. If the other is hurting, you hurt with them. You love them as you love and care for your own body until “death do us part.” Eph 5:28-29

•   A married man and woman become one flesh. The man is careful to guard his heart and mind from the many suggestive temptations of the world and the lady is wise enough to make sure that she is doing all that she can to meet his emotional and sexual needs.

Pro 5:18  Let thy fountain be blessed: and rejoice with the wife of thy youth. 

Pro 5:19  Let her be as the loving hind and pleasant roe ... and be thou ravished always with her love. 

The wife needs to feel loved

Eph 5:25  Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; 

Husbands are to give of themselves for their wife and family.

•   Long hard hours at work to provide for the financial needs of the family.

•   The exchanging of personal hobbies and pursuits that they had as a single person with hobbies and entertainments that they can enjoy WITH their wife and children.

Husbands must learn to express their love

•   Showing love through their actions and words. They are to remember that their wife is an emotional being and needs loving affirmation and stability. She needs to feel loved and secure.

In America, this would include getting her flowers for Valentines, Mother's day etc. Also helping her with chores, spending time talking to her, telling her you love her, showing her that she is the most important person in the world to you.  Cherish her.

•   He is to be faithful and loyal to her and have eyes for her alone. She is to be the love of his life and his closest confidant.

The husband needs to feel respected   Eph 5:33  ... the wife see that she reverence her husband. 

     If a man is respected at home, by his wife and by his children, he will do well in life. If he knows that his wife and children look up to him in spite of his faults, he will be able to handle a lot of stress and disrespect at work. But if a man is disrespected and made fun of at home by his wife and children, he will give up. He will hide. He will run in the opposite direction. He may bury himself with work, or some form of addiction.

     Illustration:  A company CEO and his wife had pulled their car into a gas station to fuel up. The wife recognized the station attentant and told her husband, “I used to date him”  the husband responded with, “aren't you glad you married me instead?” She responded with, “If I would have married him, he would have been the CEO and you would have been the station attendant”

The point?  A wife can make or break her husband through her encouragement or her bitter/nagging words.        Pro 12:4  A virtuous woman is a crown to her husband: but she that maketh ashamed        is as rottenness in his bones. 

The home – Should be safe, godly, loving, principled and welcoming.

     The world is full of temptations, dangers and stress but the home should be a haven. The mother and father should both make sure that they are taking the proper amount of time to build a happy home for each other and for their children.

Training our children - Pro 22:6  Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old,                he will not depart from it. 

     The school and church may do their best to intill good values in our children but the primary responsibility is with the parents. If we allow our kids to be exposed to worldly ideas, evolution, chaffy entertainments, movies, books, music, role models, heroes that are not godly...we are undoing any good that the church or school is doing.

     We must not only keep their hearts and minds pure but we are to train them or teach them the right way to live. We do this through our words, but more importantly our life.

     The Bible is very clear that we train our children to obey. Ephesians 6:1  If they learn to obey you, they will find it much easier to obey God. Biblical principles also tells us that if our child rebels by disobeying, throwing a fit, or disrespectful words, we are to discipline them in a consistent, firm and loving way.

Public school – Public school offers many benefits. Free schooling, free lunches, professional teachers, plenty of social interaction, connection to the community and a large variety of subjects and electives. From a secular standpoint, public school seems like a wonderful option...but as Christians we may also want to consider the spiritual and moral aspects of attending a public school.

Depending on where you attend public school, your child may encounter the following.

•   Curriculum which teaches an athiestic evolutionary worldview (you are a highly developed animal, you are a product of chance, you are not responsible to a higher power etc.)

•   Indoctrination of gender ideology (an unbiblical view of gender)

•   Inappropriate sex education to young children

•   Exposure to dancing, co-ed swimming, and girls having to wear shorts for sports.

•   Unsupervised play time with many kinds of children which may lead to bullying.

•   Influences from other children- Bad language, gross talk, lying, inapporpriate behavior, disrespect towards authority, peer pressure and joining in with the wrong crowd.

•   Events on Sunday which take away from church attendance and the spiritual life of the child.

Sadly, the record shows us that many children from Christian homes who attend public school in Japan end up drifting away from church and faith in their middle/high school years.

Homeschooling – Deu 6:7  And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up. 

     God's Word clearly tells us that our children's education is primarily the parent's responsibility. Many Christian parents therefore choose to take their children out of public school and give them a Christian based education at home.  This takes lots of time, commitment and sacrifice but our children's souls are worth whatever the effort it takes. Homeschooling families may use some of the following tools to improve their children's education experience.

•   Finding a homeschooling curriculum that is written from a Christian worldview and that may include monthly Scripture memory and Bible classes.

•   Setting the school day on a strict schedule and having uniforms.

•   Setting aside a room in the house as “the school room” or adding on an addition for a “school house”

•   When possible, joining a local homeschooling group. This group may meet weekly or monthly for social interaction, sports, science experiments, field trips and more.

•   When in higher grades and when dealing with difficult subjects, asking acquantances who are  experts in their field to come and give a few lessons.

Christian schooling

When a church has several families who are interested in giving their children a Christian education, a Christian school is a wonderful option. This also takes much time, sacrifice and money from the parents and church but is well worth the investment. Some of the necessary elements for a good Christian school include...

•   A proper building or space for classrooms and an outdoor play area.

•   Trained, dedicated, saved and sanctified teachers. (Both paid and volunteer)

•   Families who are willing to keep the world out of their home so that the world is kept out of the school  ( as goes the family, so goes the school, the church, and society) This may mean that any family wishing to send their child to the Christian school will have to follow certain guidelines such as church attendance, no TV, no social media, and no movies.

•   A Christian worldview based curriculum. Some schools in Japan teach Math and kokugo in Japanese and science, history and social studies in English.

•   A weekly chapel service, monthly Scripture memory, field trips and awards ceremony etc.

Family Altar – Attending church 3 times a week is wonderful but is insufficient spiritual sustenance for our children. They need to see their parents carrying on godly traditions and worship in their own home. Family altar can be adjusted to fit the needs of children of any age.

May include some of the following

▪      Family prayer  (start with the youngest and go around the room)

▪      Hymns and praise songs

▪      Scripture memory

▪      Bible skits-charades  (act out scenes in the Bible and have others guess)

If you are on a very busy schedule you may want to read a few verses after supper while still at the table. Also we do our best to pray with each child as we send them off to school.

 A Healthy family has...

1.                  Proper self-esteem – A person who is constantly told they are worthless will feel worthless and will have a hard time loving or feeling loved in the future. As Christians we can love ourselves and have self worth because we know that God loves us just the way we are. Instead of scolding a child for failure, look for something they did right and praise them. Praise and encourage each accomplishment no matter how small and children will want to do more.

2.                  Good communication -  Being open with one another, not criticizing and being negative, not interupting but being a good listener,

3.             Operating rules that are flexible, negotiable and fit the needs of the family members

We should be consistent in the rules we set but we should be also be flexible according to the age and personality of the child. Rules should not be more important than people.  (outline from  “Peoplemaking” Virginia Satir, some thoughts from “Family Secrets” Gladys Hunt )

4.                  Parents who practice what they preach. Children may not listen to what you say, but they will pay attention to the way you say it, your attitude and your conduct. It is ineffective to tell your child not to smoke if you smoke or get them in trouble for lying if you are often caught in “white lies.” Our life must match our words.

Some words of caution to wives

Some very spiritual women have made the terrible mistake of putting their husband down unitentionally. Maybe the husband  is a weak Christian or has some glaring faults. The wife may be submissive to him and love him and yet she can't help but express her disappointment that he is “not taking the lead spiritually” or “ does not have family altar” etc. She may show her disappointment with her children and even her church. What is this doing? It causes the wife, children and maybe even the church family to disrespect the husband. A man who is disrespected will never rise to others expectations of him. Many times he will go the opposite way.  She can unknowingly destroy her family and end up raising children that are rebellious and bitter against the father and mother. A wife in this situation should do her best to look for the good in her husband. Praise him for supporting the family, working hard, and any little thing that he does for God or family. Don't  pressure him to be better or to change. Don't nag. If the wife has the right kind of attitude and holy life, he will know what is right and he may be impressed enough to draw closer to God of his own accord. (This advice is adapted from an article by Debbie Pearl)